Whither goest thou Lord?
“Simon, Simon! Satan has demanded to sift all of you like wheat, but I have prayed that your own faith may not fail, and once you have turned back, you must strengthen your brothers.” (St Luke 22:31). Our Blessed Lord, in what was the beginning of His last Will and Testament, singles out Peter once again. St Peter, the Rock on whom Christ said He would build His Church.
Jesus never promised Peter that he would not fail or fall, but prayed his faith would not fail in the fall. Indeed, in Peter’s rising up again from his disgrace, Jesus called on him to truly become the Rock, standing bold and mighty against the attacks of raging seas, guiding and comforting the faithful flock in their stormy voyages of life.
Three times St. Peter disavowed his love, loyalty and friendship with Jesus Christ that bleak night in the firelight. Three times after His Resurrection Jesus challenged Peter’s love, loyalty and devotion.
In his gospel (21:15-17), St John relates a conversation he must have overheard between our Blessed Lord and St Peter during that miraculous catch of fish and supper right after the Resurrection. In that poignant exchange between God and man, between Jesus Christ and His bosom friend St Peter, His personally chosen Vicar – Christ openly and directly challenged Peter’s love and loyalty.
St. Peter was hurt, wounded in his heart, that Christ would dare to question his love and fidelity. Yet, as tradition tells it, for the rest of St. Peter’s life, remembrance of that clarion crowing of the accusing rooster at the crack of dawn would bring a flood of sorrowful tears that wore deep furrows into his cheeks.
At the end of his life, St Peter fled Rome in terror of the wicked Emperor Nero’s fierce persecution of the Christian community. Hiding out one night in a small chapel along the Appian Way, Peter encountered the risen Lord. “Quo vadis Domine? – Where are you going Lord?” Peter asked Him. Jesus replied, “I am going back to Rome to be crucified a second time.” We don’t know any more of that intimate conversation between those two dearest of friends, but Peter understood Jesus was referring to him as His Vicar, and returned to Rome to eventually be imprisoned by the wicked Nero.
And yes, St Peter was crucified for his loyalty and love of Jesus and for leading the Church founded by Christ Himself. In his profound humility, nurtured by a life of tearful repentance and feeling so unworthy to die like his Blessed Redeemer, St Peter asked to be crucified upside down, a request that he was granted. “Please, not like Him. I am so unworthy.”
May we follow the example of the first Vicar of Christ, St Peter. Let us repent of our sins with great sorrow while full of hope. Like the good St Peter, let us follow our Blessed Lord Jesus in love, loyalty and humility. Amen.